Christmas 2014

We had a most very, Merry Christmas this year! Christmas Eve was the first day of my 12 days of unemployment between Orbitz and Roti, so I was in a jolly mood and had fun making paper Christmas trees with the kids and getting them pumped up for Santa's big visit that night. Lainey chose to leave out mixed nuts and OJ for Santa's snack. Not sure why those were chosen, but we liked her creativity!

I loved, loved, loved that we had Christmas morning at the house. Nick woke at 5am, but Mark managed to keep him entertained in our room until 5:45am when the little guy could stand it no more and came in to wake Lainey and me (I was called into her room around 4am). Once Mark called that the coast was clear and Santa wasn't still there (aka the video camera was on and the coffee was brewing), we bounded downstairs to check out the bounty.

As requested, Santa brought a small cake and cupcakes for each of the kids, which we decided to go ahead and put out by the tree. As soon as Nick saw them, he shouted "cu-cake!! CU-CAKE!!!" and there would be no further interest in the presents until the cupcake had been devoured (which took him a surprisingly long time). The kids loved their gifts from Santa and us. For Nick, his train set and workbench were the big winners. For Lainey, she loved her new doll (now named Rosemary), Magna-Tiles and her piggy bank (score on that one--we weren't sure how she'd feel about it). Even though there was no snow to be had this Christmas, they kids still had fun playing in their sleds, pretending they were boats. They also fell madly in love with the Wild Kratts dolls left in their stockings--Chris for Lainey and Martin for Nick. Guess Santa didn't think they'd be such a hit and figured it wouldn't be a big deal to split the pair between them. Santa was wrong--there were quite a few tussles over the course of the day, because they both wanted Martin AND Chris. Santa did have one delivery snafu and the bed to go with Lainey's doll didn't arrive--and she remembered quite clearly that she had asked for a bed for her doll. Thank goodness Santa left a note explaining his elf had broken the gift and he would send it by mail. Such thoughtful (and smart), Santa!

Chris and Sean arrived in the afternoon and kept the kids entertained while I made dinner. We waited until Nick was down for the night to eat and stuck Lainey in front of a movie, so I could actually enjoy the meal I had prepared (a nice treat). Dad and Sharon arrived the afternoon of the 26th and Christmas #2 went down that night. Luckily, Mark and I didn't rush out and get the extra pair of Kratt dolls that morning, because they were well forgotten amid the avalanche of gifts brought by Chris, Sean, Dad and Sharon. Seriously, good thing I told them to "take it easy on the gifts" or we would need to buy a new house to fit everything! And Santa must have an in with the USPS, because he managed to get the "broken" bed delivered to go with the rest of the Christmas #2 stash.

My family stayed until Monday, so the kids got spoiled with attention (and I got spoiled with extra hands to keep them entertained). Lainey had a blast playing with all her toys with her uncles, especially her new Legos and Hungry, Hungry Hippos. Nick had fun entertaining everyone and being adorable.

Today was back to life as usual (except I'm still not working, so enjoyed a day all to myself!!!), but we'll be gearing up for Christmas #3 this weekend when we visit Moline. Let's keep the joy going!!!

Cupcakes for breakfast!



Sled...boat...doesn't matter, he loved it! (His is green, but he wanted to be in Lainey's pink one)

No snow, but it was warm, so we got outside and ran off the cupcakes!




Happy family!

 

 

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year (if you let it be)

MLast week I was in total Grinch mode. My “to do” list was too long, work was stressful, and the kids weren’t sleeping. I was over-stressed and over-tired and in a general “bah humbug” mood. So, I declared Saturday a “no chores, no errands day.” I just wanted us to spend time together as a family doing some fun, holiday activities. The temperatures weren’t too bad on Saturday, so we decided to take the kids downtown to see the tree in Daley Plaza and the Macy’s animated windows. To make the trip a little more special and adventurous we took the Metra instead of driving. Lainey loved it!

On the way to Daley Plaza, we looked at all the trees in the various building lobbies and Lainey would ask, “is this the big tree?” and we'd say, “this one is big, but we’ll see one even bigger!” Well, the official city tree was bigger, but it was pretty sparse and sad looking—tight budget, I guess. Not that the kids noticed anyway; they were more enamored with the street performers and the video of a fireplace on the side of Block 37. They did enjoy the Macy’s windows (and more street performers,) and they really liked being at Millennium Park watching the ice skaters and checking out the Bean.

Because we took the Metra, we were on a pretty tight time table, only two hours from when we arrived to when our return train departed, so we had to hustle back with no time to stop and eat lunch. Great news for Lainey and Nick, because it meant they got to have giant cookies on the ride home to tide them over. (I still managed to get some fruit and veggies down them once we got home.)The outing exhausted them and they both took three-hour naps—and I indulged in a long one, too. The no errands, no chores rule applied to the whole family for the whole day!

Mark did do one chore; he flipped Nick’s car seat to face forward. I know, I know, the new recommendation is age two, but he hates it and his legs are really too long to sit that way anymore. Plus, the new vantage was needed for our evening activity…Christmas lights! There is a neighborhood mere minutes from our house that really does it up at Christmas time. (For my local peeps, take a drive through Lincolnwood Towers with the kiddos for some easy, free holiday fun). After dinner we changed the kids into their jammies and headed out. Lainey was excited to be going out for a “night trip” and Nick was in awe of his new seating arrangement—I don’t think we even needed to see something special, he was just happy to face forward. He kept saying, “Wow! Cool!” and that was just checking out the plain, old streetlights on Caldwell. After our tour of Christmas lights, it was back home to watch “Prep & Landing: Naughty or Nice” before time bedtime.

After the kids went to sleep, Mark and I enjoyed some quiet time together. Our schedules have been mismatched all month, plus he’s been traveling for work, so it was nice to have a night home together.  We watched Home Alone (one of my favorites) and wrapped the kids’ gifts, deciding what Santa would bring and what would come from us. We’re pretty excited that we get to have Christmas morning in our house this year. I think I may have trouble sleeping on Christmas Eve from the anticipation!

I have to say, it was a pretty awesome day and put me firmly in the Christmas spirit. It’s so special to get some of the magic back through the kids’ excitement and wonderment at it all. It’s going to be a busy two weeks with guests and travel, but if I can just remember what is important and not sweat the small stuff (Ha!), it really should be the most wonderful time!

Check out those smiles!
(And Lainey's most unforgiving hat head)

School Pictures are In!!! And they're fabulous, as only school pictures can be...

We didn't buy any prints, because they are never going up on our walls--can you imagine slapping one of these up beside one of Josh Ford's incredible images? But we still had to get the images for posterity's sake. I am happy to see that Lainey doesn't look like a wee troll this year--hers are actually very good. She looks particularly sassy in the one with the faux winter wonderland (why, oh why, do they insist on these fake nature backgrounds?).  Nick's aren't bad either, but he was having some allergy issues that day so his eyes and face are a littly puffy. Still looking handsome in his shawl neck sweater. Anyway, enjoy the pictures!

Santa Time!

During our trip to Moline, we nabbed our annual picture with Santa. We managed to get a forced grin from Lainey, but Nick looks completely bored. Mark and I commented that we'd almost prefer a really awful one with screaming and crying, because it makes for a good laugh later. But, since the process is so painless at the South Park Mall (no line and inexpensive), we really don't sweat the photo. It's more about the experience of visiting Santa.

Lainey refused to ask the big guy for anything at the time, but made up for the lost opportunity in her letter below. The only prompts I gave her were, "what would you like Santa to bring you," and "why should he bring you presents?" I was hoping for something more along the lines of "I've been good" for the latter, but I guess I don't want her to be a liar either. Her answer is better...

Mark to the Rescue

Although this happened almost a week ago on Sunday, I’m still going to post about it, because I’m still laughing (and still a little bewildered at Mark’s behavior). Before I get to the story, let me preface by saying, of the two of us, Mark is the level-headed, calm, rational one, where as I’m a little more hot-headed, excitable, and emotional. But, not this time.

This whole situation went down in less than two minutes. Nick and I walk in the door from his doctor’s appointment and find Lainey “helping” Mark decorate the tree. The moment we took our eyes of her to discuss Nick’s ear infection, Lainey stuck her finger in a glass ornament and got it stuck. I put Nick down and said, “let me get some oil.” Nick starts screaming, because he wants to be held, so Lainey starts screaming, because she wants all the attention. However, Mark interprets her screams as her finger is being amputated by the ornament. He starts yelling, “We have to break it off! We have to break it off!” and runs and grabs a hammer. I tell him to slow his roll and to let me try the oil first. He looks me IN THE EYE and AGREES to wait, but in the two seconds it takes me to get the oil from the pantry, he goes with his plan and breaks the ornament, leaving a jagged ring of glass still stuck on Lainey’s finger. The children’s screams escalate and Mark runs to the garage again. This time he returns with the jaws of life (okay, pliers, but what he thought he was going to do with those I have no idea), just as I pour a little oil over Lainey’s finger and VERY EASILY slide the ornament (or what was left of it) off. To be honest, it came off so easily, I’m not even sure the oil was needed—there wasn’t even an indentation in her skin.

So, there are shards of broken glass all over the kitchen table and Lainey is still crying, because now the ornament is broken. I look at Mark and say, “What the heck, man?” (I kept it clean for little ears, but he knows what I was really saying to him.) And then I start laughing, because he still has a wild-eyed look and I really cannot believe he just reacted like a deranged firefighter. My laughter starts the kids’ laughter. I tell Lainey she can come to Target with me and pick out a new ornament and order is restored to the house. 

But, you can bet I’m not letting Mark forget this anytime soon. Next time he tells me to “calm down” or “relax,” I’ll be reminding him of this little scene. 

Gobble, Gobble

A little delayed in getting to this post, but better late than never! We had a very Happy Thanksgiving, Quad Cities-style with lots of family, food, and fun!

Lainey adored spending time with her cousins and pretty much followed Amelia around like a shadow. She learned some new card games and did fairly well participating and following the rules. Amelia and Oliver were very patient with her. Nick and Eleanor didn’t seem particularly interested in each other at first, but came around by the end of the weekend, and I managed to snag a great picture of them together. Nick is not much taller than Eleanor, but I feel like his body is twice her size. It was funny to watch the differences in how they move. Eleanor is a dainty, agile girl who flits, and Nick is a brick of a boy, who lumbers. But, don't let her sweet voice and prancing fool you...Eleanor is a girl who is in charge! (I love it!)

Rebecca and Tim hosted the big feast for Thanksgiving (thank you, again!). The younger kids had a blast playing in the basement and being dragged around on bean bag chairs by Mark and Matthew. Luckily for them, Jacob and Ben stepped up to take over the heavy lifting (or dragging, I suppose) and give the old men a break. Such great big cousins! More fun was to be had on Friday with the whole crew together again at Frank and Lonnie’s for pizza, a dance party, and more games! Lainey was in heaven. When it was time to go on Saturday, Lainey cried, “but, I’m having so much fun at Grandma’s!” How did a long weekend go by so FAST?!!!

Nick usually sleeps like a log in Moline (because we room him in a pitch-black closet), but not so much this time. He was up at the wee hours most mornings, likely due to a brewing ear infection, which we didn’t get treated until Sunday. Lainey slept fairly well, however, and I got two mornings of cuddles in bed with her. We threw bedtimes out the window while we were there, and I thought both kids were going to be completely ruined, but they’ve gone right back to the old routine and have actually slept late every morning since we’ve been back.

I am thankful, thankful, thankful for my wonderful family, food in our bellies, a roof over our heads, and an endless supply of love!

Bean Bag Shenanigans

Cousins!

I just love this picture!

The Brandi Siblings

Just Call Her Maria

Lainey recently learned "Do, Re, Mi" from The Sound of Music, but she has really improved the lyrics.

Lainey's Version:

Do, a deer, a family deer
Re, a drop of golden sun
Mi, a name I call myself
Fa, I'm on my way to run
So, I need a pully thread
La, a note to follow So
Ti, I drink a lot of bread (alternate version...I drink banana bread)
That will bring us back to Do, oh, oh, oh

Much better version, if you ask me.

Of course I have a video to share...and you get to see some of her best bed head to boot!

The Weekend

We enjoyed a quick visit from Lonnie this weekend. The kids were very excited to see Grandma and jostled her around vying for her undivided attention. It will be interesting to see how it all goes down at Thanksgiving when they have to share her with each other AND their cousins!

After talking about it for almost a year, we finally made a trip to the Kohl’s Children’s Museum in Glenview. We went ahead and pulled the trigger on a family membership before we even visited the place, because it only takes three trips to pay it off. We figured it had to be good enough to meet that requirement, considering we made at least that many trips to the Little Beans Café last winter. Great move on our end! The place is awesome and will be a new favorite spot for the cold winter ahead. It has so many fabulous exhibits, including a tiny Whole Foods and Potbelly Sandwich Shop! Adorable! Nick loved all the “butts” to press (butts = buttons for those not fluent in Nick-speak) and Lainey pretty much loved everything. The only thing missing is you can’t carry your latte around with you like at Little Beans, but you also don’t have to fight for every square inch of space (trade-offs.)

Sunday we hit up our much-loved m. henry for brunch. It was a slightly disappointing visit—Mark’s food came out cold and they forgot my order altogether. But, they comped my blisscakes and fixed Mark’s benedict fairly quickly, so we’ll let it slide. Nick stole ALL of my blackberries from my blisscakes. The plate was barely on the table and his little hand shot over and started grabbing. Stinker. Stealing food from my plate is his new trick. Even if he has the exact same thing on his plate, he’ll reach over and take mine. But, both kids were really well behaved, so if I have to lose my blackberries to avoid a public tantrum, so be it.

After brunch, it was time for outdoor play to work off our indulgence and soak up that fresh fall air. Lainey showed Grandma how she can ride all the way around the block on her tricycle, before hitting the leaf piles--still a favorite activity of both kids. We played outside until the runny noses were flowing a little too freely.

And then just like that…it was time for Lonnie to drive back to Moline and for us to start preparing for the week ahead. Oh weekends, why are the best of you so fleeting?

Crossing the "bridge" she built between the two piles

A pile of leaves works better than a playpen at keeping Nick contained...

Un-doing our raking

Happy Halloween!

It was a blustery, cold day (first snow of the season), but our little Elsa and Olaf still hit the trick or treating trail. The Olaf costume came with a hat, so he was all good, and as for Elsa, "the cold never bothered (her) anyway" (sorry, I couldn't resist!). Being the smart parents we are, we actually dressed the kids up last weekend on that beautiful 70-degree day and took some pictures in the backyard. True to form, they weren't super cooperative in posing, but they were even worse tonight (and things started to get tense as we tried to get ONE decent shot), so I'm glad we took the time last weekend. See results below...

The kids had a party at daycare this morning, complete with a pinata and magician, and Mark and I were able to take off early to start what we hoped would be some trick or treating fun. But, the snow flurries started on the way home and by the time we were hitting houses it was sleeting and Nick was saying, "Owie! Owie!" So, we only made it to our immediate neighbors and then headed back inside. Even Elaine said she wanted to go home (so, maybe the cold bothered her a little bit).

I think Lainey was a little disappointed, but no problem for Nick. We had plenty of surplus candy, so he just helped himself our bowl and filled up his pumpkin pail. If we would have given him free reign, he would have eaten it all, too. Instead, we had to endure several tantrums when we denied him more of the sweet stuff. We eased Lainey's pain with pepperoni pizza (her new favorite food) and some extra TV time. It worked...right before bed, she smiled and said, "Mommy, I had a fun Halloween!" I'm so glad, my little love!

Queen Elsa and Me

Dad and Olaf

I guess the snow is fitting, given the costumes...

Don't mind if I do...

OK to Wake!

OK to WAKE!

After three years of battling bedtime, sleeping on the couch, sleeping on her floor, not sleeping at all, Lainey may FINALLY allow us the full night's sleep we've so desperately craved. We've had a solid six weeks of her letting us leave her room after story time and fall asleep on her own (so, nice getting those 30 - 60 minutes back each night) and other than a few nights where she's had a nightmare or has been sick, she sleeps through the night. We got to that point using the trusty "Lainey's Rewards" sticker method. This was amazing progress and we were really happy, but she was still getting up at 4:30 AM every day, which we weren't really happy about. Enter the OK to Wake alarm clock--the best $30 we've ever spent!

You set the clock for a certain time in the morning, but instead of an alarm, the clock glows green. This is the signal that is "OK to wake" and your little one can get out of bed. The clock glows instead of making noise, so if your munchkin is blissfully snoozing PAST the set time, she will sleep right through it. You can also rig a light with a timer for those DIYs out there, but we wanted a clock for her room anyway, so we went this route. We started it with Lainey almost two weeks ago and she's waited every single morning to call for me until it goes off. I can't believe it was this easy!!! She gets her sticker rewards for staying in her room (she doesn't have to stay in bed--she can play) and earned a cupcake last Friday. She's so proud every morning I go in her room, "Mommy, I did it again!"

So sleep training took the long route with Lainey, but I think we're finally there...just in time for Nick to start getting up at 4:30 AM every day...wah wah.

Pumpkinfest!

I'm about a week overdue for this post, but better late than never. Last weekend, Dad and Sharon visited and we took the opportunity to hit up the Pumpkinfest at Didier Farms. We lucked out with gorgeous weather, and it was surprisingly uncrowded and easy to hop from ride to ride and move about selecting our pumpkins.

Lainey had a blast and Nick got his first turn at a few carnival rides…even going on one with just his big sister to watch over him. I was pretty reluctant to try that, but Mark persuaded me. The super slide was Lainey’s favorite, although I’m not sure how Nick felt about that one. He didn’t cry, but he didn’t smile either. He just kind of let his tongue hang out the side of his mouth like a dog. 

The one ride that was a little questionable was the army tank with machine guns. Lainey wanted to go on it and there was no line, so I said, “Sure!” It wasn’t until I was standing there poised to take her picture that I realized my 3-year-old was sitting in an army tank with machine guns! What?! The ride couldn’t have been just as fun with some sort of other carriage? Watching Lainey work those guns back and forth just didn’t sit right with me. But, I guess I should have been a little more observant before I sent her on her way.

We had fun picking out our pumpkins. Lainey and Nick kept loading them into the wagon (and Mark and I kept taking them back out). Lainey pulled the wagon all the way to the car. I gotta say I was pretty impressed. She did a great job maneuvering the crowds and it wasn’t exactly a short walk.

I wish I had better pictures or had taken at least ONE family photo, but I didn’t. The kids are not cooperative about posing and most of the time trying to get a picture turns into a stressful event. So, I settle for whatever quick shots I can get and when they start protesting I stop. I’d prefer spend the time actually building a memory than trying to perfectly preserve it to look back on later. (But, it’s taken me a while to get there…Mark’s still working on it, hence why I don’t push for family pictures. He just ends up disappointed.) Here's what I did manage to get of the little rascals...now we just need to find time to carve those pumpkins!

Lainey LOVES the slide!

Nick migh be glad it's over...

No other ideas ride makers...

First pony ride!

Oh yeah...and there were pumpkins, too!

Second Child...

Last week, we were sitting with the kids while they colored and I commented, “you know, Lainey knew her colors by this age.” So, Mark holds up a green crayon and asks Nick what color it is…”Reen!,” he shouts. Holds up a yellow one…”Ello!” Holds up a red one, “Red!” Holds up a blue one…”Reen!” Close, little buddy. So, he’s not perfect at it, but clearly he’s on track. We just didn’t know it! (We kind of discovered that he knows his body parts in the same fashion.)

I wish I could say we spend as much time fostering the basics with Nick as we did Lainey, but I would be lying. She benefitted from undivided attention in those first two years, and he has to share. On top of that he has a sister, who knows how to demand MORE than her fair share.

But, while I let a lot of parenting shortcomings (or at the very least perceived shortcomings) get to me, this isn’t going to be one of them. I have no doubt that somehow he will manage to overcome his standing as second child and still master his alphabet, numbers, and colors well within the normal range of things. Two things I know he gets his fair share of are hugs and kisses! Who could resist those cheeks?

Little Drummer Boy

Dude Still Looks Like a Lady

Maybe it's those soft, soft hands of his, but evidently something about Mark just says "mama" to our kids. If you'll recall, Lainey went through a "daddy is mommy" phase, and Nick is following right in her footsteps. For some unexplicable reason, Nick started calling Mark "Mama" a few weeks ago. The difference with Nick is he mainly calls Mark "mama" when he's upset or wants Mark's attention--maybe it's Nick's form of punishment. If Mark leaves the room, Nick will let loose with a forlorn call of "Mama" and go chasing after him. Today, even though the real Mama was holding him, Nick wailed "Maaaaaaa-maaaaaa" arms outstreched and tears rolling down his face, because Mark dared go to the bathroom.

I personally don't want to hear any complaints. Mark is Nick's best friend. I'd let Nick call me "Dada" all day, if he adored me a fraction of the way he adores Mark. At least I get to hear my name...

Mama's make good nap buddies

Mom (formerly known as Kylie)

I’m having a bit of an identity crisis. I realized it might be time for some self-reflection when I had a mild panic attack while shopping for some new clothes online. The search for new black pants should not make me hyperventilate, but as I hopped from website to website and scrolled through pages of thumbnails, it occurred to me that I have no idea what is on trend right now—do people still wear boot cut? Or is skinny the only way to go? Straight leg looks polular. And what is this “drapey” style I see?  Too many choices!!! Even worse, as I tried to zero in on a few key wardrobe addtions, I was at a complete loss as to what my personal style is these days—assuming one should not adopt yoga pants and event t-shirts as her personal style. Not that I have ever been a super-edgy, fashionista, but I used to know how to throw an outfit together and doll myself up right. And shopping has certainly never been a stress-inducing activity. I ended up just shutting down the computer.

The shopping meltdown led me to start thinking about other ways I feel out-of-touch these days.  The only way I keep up on current events is through my daily “Skimm” e-newsletter and viewings of The Daily Show as I nod off at night. As far as what's happing in the world of pop culture--beats me! I couldn’t name one song on the top 40, if you offered me a winning lottery ticket to do it and could name maybe 1 or 2 actors under the age of 35. Which some may say is a good thing, but it just makes me feel old. I find myself totally confused when scrolling through facebook and Instagram, trying to decipher all the acronyms and emoji and figure out what the hell people are talking about. Thank heaven for Urban Dictionary!

As for my literature knowledge, could someone please remind me what a novel is again? When Chris and Sean visited this summer, the subject of “what books have you read” came up. Four years ago, I would have rattled off at least four or five recent reads. This time I was like “uh, uh…But, Not the Hippopotamus? What? You haven’t read it? You should…it’s a classic. Great take on marginalization with a total surprise ending of the oppressed becoming the oppressor. I really felt for the armadillo.”

And then there is the issue of lapsed communications with friends. Friends, whom I love so dearly and miss every day, but I just can’t seem to find the time to call or email, let alone find time to actually SEE. And each day that passes seems to make it harder to reach out and I fear by the time I get my act together those relationships may just silently slip away.

Lately, I just feel like I’m stumbling through each day, trying to get it all done, but with no clear purpose. I feel I’m always reactive, not proactive, and it’s giving me a case of the “icks.” I’m a planner by nature. I like a clean “to do” list that gets cleared regularly. I like time to myself. I like extra sleep. I like lazy days with a good book and long brunches with friends. None of these “likes” are really compatible with my life right now. Outside of time with the kids, I’m forgetting what else interests me and brings me joy.

I know this is a phase of life. I know it will not last forever. I know in a flash I’ll have two teenagers who are NEVER home and NEVER want my attention. But, while I’m on this ride of motherhood and total infatuation with my young ones, what happens if I forget how to be me? 

Weight of the Matter

Lainey had her three-year check-up yesterday. The good news is she is a happy, well-developed little girl. She did great answering the doctor’s questions and FINALLY agreed to stand on the scale alone! I credit her newfound cooperation to a well-timed episode of Daniel Tiger visiting the doctor and, of course, Doc McStuffins.  

But, all was not rosy. It turns out Lainey’s BMI is a little too high and she is, in fact, overweight. Not by much—we’re talking one pound—but, she’s “at risk” for a weight problem. This news was like a punch in my gut. The doctor started talking about making better food choices and seeing that Lainey’s getting plenty of physical activity. I sat there trying to keep cool and not scream “but, we DO make good food choices and she DOES get physical activity.”  I felt like the doctor was assuming all we do is feed her Cheetos and plop her in front of the tube (which really isn’t fair to the doctor, because she was not at all preachy or condescending). Lainey did not help the matter when the doctor asked her to name some of her favorite foods. I froze and held my breath…please don’t say brownies, please don’t say brownies. Lainey thought and then enthusiastically shouted, “Cookies!! No…BROWNIES! I loooovvve brownies.” (We just made a pan this weekend of which she only got two SMALL pieces after dinner on Saturday and Tuesday.)

Had I been able to pull my thoughts together more quickly and not worried so much about sounding defensive, I would have talked more about what Lainey does eat regularly to see if maybe there are areas that could use fine tuning. But at the time of the visit, all I managed was a meek, “we really don’t let them have treats that often,” and brought up the issue of how much milk she drinks, because she drink A LOT. If they made milk can hats, she’d have one on all day and never stop slurping the white stuff. Total milk-aholic.

I’m trying to keep a cool head about this—the doctor said there is no need for any drastic action, it’s just something to be aware of. But, part of the reason I’m particularly troubled is I bring a family history of obesity to Lainey’s make-up, so since she was a baby I’ve been thinking about how to address healthy eating and how to deal with the possibility that she may naturally be heavier than her peers. I’ve been reading a lot of parenting articles lately about this issue, because I need the help. I am very fortunate that I’ve never really had to worry about my weight. But, just because I don’t have to say “no” to office donuts and can have dessert whenever I’d like, doesn’t mean I should. Healthy eating is about more than weight. It’s about building a strong, healthy body. It’s really important to me that we keep the focus on “strength” versus “fat” as we start discussing food choices with Lainey. Mark innocently dropped D-I-E-T in front of her last night, and I jumped on him about it. He didn’t understand why I was upset, and I told him it’s different for girls and we need to be careful about what we say, even at her young age. Even as a “skinny girl” in high school, I still felt pressure to go on diets and would look at my tiny frame and think I looked fat. I’ve seen too many friends suffer eating disorders in their fight with body image. I try very hard not to use the words skinny and fat when talking about how I look or feel, because I don’t want to start implanting those concepts into Lainey’s tiny head (okay, her HUGE head—maybe that’s where the extra pound is?).

After we tucked our sweet girl in last night, Mark and I talked and agreed that we’ve become a little lax on the sweet treats this summer, so we’re going to limit them to the weekends and special occasions. We’re also cutting back on her milk and cheese intake. As far as activity level, I’m not concerned there. I really do believe she gets plenty of exercise. In fact, on weekend mornings it’s a top priority for me, if for no other reason than to ensure a good, long afternoon nap!

Ah, the bumps in the road! Hopefully this one turns out to be just a tiny pebble and when Lainey goes back in June for her four-year exam we breeze right through the BMI check!

To end on a positive note, because weight is after all only one measure of health, Lainey continues to rock the development markers. She’s blows the three-year-old developmental questionnaire out of the water and is already meeting most of the four-year-old milestones. Per her daycare teacher, she is an “absolute joy” to have in class. The children all love playing with her, and she is very “confident and bright.” At the end of the day, I would much rather be worrying about a little extra weight than cognitive or social issues. Our girl is FIERCE! 

Lookin' good, lookin' fly!

18 Months and Doin' Fine!

We had Nick's 18-month check-up today, and I happy to report we still have a big, strong, healthy boy. Here's his latest stats: 28 lbs., 8 oz.  (90%), 33.5 inches (75%) and 19.5 inch head circumference (90%).

Nick's hitting all his milestones...no more gross motor lags for our rough and tumble guy! He is jabbering non-stop and I pretty much think every new word he picks up is the most adorable ever.
Lainey is his best friend (and his worst enemy). When they aren't hugging and kissing each other, they are pushing and hitting, but Nick gives as good as he gets these days. We've started giving some time outs for hitting. He's also started with the temper tantrums when he doesn't get what he wants, but his seem less volatile that Lainey's (or maybe we're just hardened parents at this point).

Nick's doing great using utensils and has started drinking from a regular cup with moderate success. He's on his way to ditching the highchair and moving to a booster seat at the table. Right now we're just letting him choose which he wants and it seems to be alternating every other meal. Of course, once he decides the highchair is no more, we have to come up with a new configuration for the kitchen table, because only three of us can fit around it now.

Daycare is still going great for Nick! He gets excited walking up to the building and there are never any tears when we leave. The teachers LOVE him and tell me what a good boy he is every day.

Here's a recent photo of Nick from the park. His nose is almost done healing, just one little scab left! Love this happy, little guy!

Ouch!

Nick’s had his first big injury this past weekend. Sunday morning our little guy took a tumble off the curb and broke his fall with his face. He scraped his forehead and cheek and completely wrecked his nose. I was in the house when it happened, but Mark said he practically nose-dived into the sidewalk and the “thud” was really loud when he hit, so I think we’re lucky it wasn’t worse. All his teeth are still in place and no bruising. He still looks like Rudolph, but the scab under his nose came off and his forehead is almost cleared up.

Nick was a tough guy! Just some initial crying and a good cuddle session with a non-bedtime binky treat and he was back to his old happy self. It took Mark most of the day to get over it (actually, I think he’s still getting over it).

Hey, if they never get a scrape, they aren't having enough fun, right?

Still feeling kind of sad...

Ready to rock again...what bloody nose?

Coming Up for Air...

Last week was just a mess. Icky. Stressful. Looooong.

My cozy intro at my job wore off and things went into warp speed, resulting in a late work night on a Friday. Ugh. On the home front, the kids had a bad sleep week, and I was miles behind on house work from overindulging in fun and ignoring chores Labor Day weekend. Then cooler temperatures descended and I realized the kids had nothing to wear, always a fun discovery at 6:00 AM during the work week. It seemed for every one thing I got off my list, five things were added, and the more I had to do, the more I just wanted to crawl into bed and sleep, which is what I ended up doing Saturday afternoon. I had intended to just take a quick 20-minute nap next to Lainey, but I fell asleep hard and fast with my little lady cuddled up next to me and didn’t stir for over two hours. Oops…

I beat myself up for sleeping instead whittling down my “to do” list. Just as I was getting myself really agitated, I managed to stop, breathe, and imagine what I would say to a friend in my situation. Then I took my own advice and decided nothing life shattering was on my list and the world would keep turning if I never did even one thing on it. Then I stopped cleaning the kitchen and went and colored with Lainey.

This week is proving to be another challenging one (and will be capped off by Mark taking a weekend trip away). I’ll be trying to keep perspective and stay positive instead of letting the doldrums creep up on me.  But, they’re sneaky little suckers, those duldrums…good thing I have my two sunshines to help battles them away!

Worry for Nothing

Well, my strategy worked. I worried myself sick and sleepless over the daycare transition, and it turn out to be all for naught. I'm happy to report that the first week at the new daycare went very well!  

Nick is having some trouble at morning drop-off, but no worse than what we went through when he transitioned to the toddler room at CLP. Lainey dragged her feet and pouted a bit the first two drop-offs, but no tears and she was fine Thursday and Friday, and evidently is doing amazing during the day. The teachers seem really great and have been very communicative and patient with us this first week. 

And the icing on the cake is a much more enjoyable commute for everyone, including Friday evening beers on the Metra for Mark and me! Fun way to start  the weekend!

          Cheers to life getting a little easier!

Goodbye CLP

Today was our last day with CLP. It was a teary morning drop-off, but I held up much better at afternoon pick-up. It just hard saying goodbye. These women have seen my kids through a lot over the past three years. They've seen them through countless blow-outs, scrapes, and tantrums. They've played with them, nurtured them, and taught them. But, most of all, they have loved them. I always knew that Lainey and Nick were getting plenty of love during the day. The teachers always made it seem like they were their "favorites," which I'm sure they did with most parents, but it was nice to think your kids were extra special.

And Tuesday we will begin again. While I've come to terms that we won't enjoy some of the "frills" offered at CLP, I'm nervous about the love part. And I'm absolutely twisted up about dropping them off with a room of strangers and walking out the door. It was easy when they started daycare at 12 weeks--as long as someone fed and changed them, they could have cared less. But, it's going to be a whole new ballgame. Maybe the more I torture myself over it for the next four days, the easier it will be Tuesday morning, and I can laugh about getting myself worked up over nothing.

I know we're making the right decision--on so many levels. The traffic we experience today to/from CLP, while Nick screamed 90% of the way, was a solid reminder that we need to have them closer to the house. And the hefty chunk of cash we just had to shell over to fix the air conditioner was a lot easier to swallow knowing we'll be saving on the daycare front. But, just because it's the right decision, doesn't mean it's been the easy one.

Wish us luck on Tuesday!

So, Things Work out

At daycare drop-off, I found out Lainey's bestie also is leaving CLP at the end of the month. And it makes me feel better about making the change. Lainey would have been very sad without Sydney. As Mark said, time to make new friends...

My Son Plays with Dolls

Nick loves playing with dolls, strollers, and has recently shown an interest in cross-dressing (the boy loves his handbags and he looks damn good in Lainey’s pink sweatshirt). I don’t care—but, I’ve been surprised by how many other people seem to think I should be putting a stop to it.

I’ve had a couple interesting encounters since having a son. Last summer at the park, a woman was utterly baffled that Nick was a boy, because I happened to be feeding him from a pink bottle. She seriously COULD NOT wrap her mind around that situation. Today, a woman who had just finished complaining about how her husband doesn’t share in their domestic duties and child care, wigged out when I talked about how much Nick loves playing with Lainey’s dolls and purses. She looked at me as if I’d just shot a snot rocket at her and then she continued on a little tirade about how she would never allow her son to have a doll. I wish I could say this is an isolated conversation, but I’ve heard the same perspective often—be it about Nick or another boy.  Hmmmm. So, let me get this straight, we want men to value and participate in the domestic realm, but when raising our boys, we should emphasize those are strictly girl activities? Got it. Makes total sense.

Every day I see men cradling, kissing, and hugging babies. Mark is very involved in caring for our kids. He holds them, rocks them, fixes their boo-boos, and puts them to bed. It’s almost like he’s their parent—crazy, I know. And I don’t think anyone would be aghast to see Mark holding a baby, so why can’t Nick imitate that behavior with a doll without people freaking out over it?

There is a lot of buzz and dialogue about how to promote female leadership and interest in STEM fields (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics)—think Google’s “Girls Who Code” summer program and Sheryl Sandberg’s “Ban Bossy” campaign. It’s great to see conversation around building confidence in girls and helping them explore beyond traditional “girl” activities at an early age, but that encouragement does exactly roll the other way, does it?

If I let Lainey loose down the “boy” toy aisle at Target to grab an action figure, no problem. Many people would even think it was “cool” that she isn’t completely wrapped up in the world of princesses. But, if I let Nick toddle down the Barbie aisle with his purse hitched over his shoulder…we’re looking at a different situation.   

So, yes, I let Nick play with the dollhouse and wear Lainey’s dresses. I don't care and I don't worry. He's 17 months old. And if he’s five and likes wearing a tiara and bracelets, I still won’t care…but, I may start to worry. Not because I think it’s wrong, but because other people will make their opinions known and they can be nasty and cruel. I read a great blog post from a father who lets his son wear dresses: My Son Wears Dresses, and that's OK with Me. What's terrifying to me is the amount of hateful comments posted in response to such an incredibly loving, accepting parenting choice. 

So, for me, it's not about stopping my kids from being different, it's about protecting them from people who think different is wrong. I think about that a lot and how I will handle the tough situations as my kids evolve and perhaps choose a path that doesn’t follow the “norm.” Will I be able to stand strong and help my children be the people they want to be, or will I start suggesting Nick only wears his bedazzled purple shirt to bed and tries playing football? I really don’t know the answer to that—and it’s more than a little scary to consider navigating those waters. 

There’s no sense worrying about it today, because who knows what the future will bring, but these are important discussions to have as we try to raise a generation that is more tolerant, inclusive and willing to accept differences—if not embrace and welcome them.

In the meantime, you play with your babies, Nick! And I think the purple purse looks better on you than the pink—but, choose whichever makes you happy. 

                  Smooches for baby

Ch-ch-changes...

We’re finally moving the kids from their daycare in Bucktown to a center by our house. It’s the right move, both from a convenience and financial standpoint, but it is far more emotional that I had expected. 

It all happened rather quickly. Now that Nick is old enough (they only take 15 months and up), I'd been meaning to call the daycare in our area. At our block party, we spoke to a neighbor who sends her kids there, so I asked her the tuition rate. The answer would have made me call that second to get on the waitlist if it weren't a Saturday afternoon. Instead I called first thing Monday morning, expecting to be added to a lengthy list. Turns out a family had just moved and she could take us in September if we committed that week. 

We went out that night for our tour, and I'll say you get what you pay for. It's not that it's a bad center (obviously or we wouldn't go through with this)--in fact, had a center like this been available to us three years ago, I would have chosen it over CLP. But, it wasn't and now we've become accustomed to the CLP's frills...field trips to the major museums and parks, Parents' Night Out, yoga and music lessons, etc. None of that's happening at the new place. And it's a little more crowded--the toddler room and preschool room are actually just in separate areas of one main room. So, Lainey and Nick will essentially be together all day--which I kind of like, but wonder if Lainey will feel the same. At the end of the day, the scene we saw on our visit was pretty much the same thing we see at CLP pick-up--kids coloring, singing songs and laughing. So, we decided to take the plunge. We may have fretted a little more, but our neighbor happens to be the assistant principal at one of the top Chicago high schools. If she thinks this place is good enough for her kids, it eases a lot of anxiety for us.  

So, there’s the obvious emotions around the kids well-being, but it goes deeper for us. Keeping the kids in Bucktown kept us connected to our former world. Even though we’ll still be downtown every day for work, our bond to the city gets a little more distant with this switch. As long as we still walked Milwaukee Avenue to the Blue Line every day, I still felt like a city-dweller and a part of the neighborhoods where we lived for almost 10 years (longer for Mark). I mean, we've even kept our Bucktown dry cleaner! 

I just have to remember that when we first moved to Edgebrook, I was nervous and scared that I was going to hate it. And it turned out to be the absolute best thing for our family and I love living here now. Making this change will make life a lot easier (good-bye morning traffic) and will help connect us more to the area where we've chosen to raise Lainey and Nick. So, deep breathes, unclench the hands, and get ready for another new chapter...

Pucker Up

While I do think parenting the year between ages 1 and 2 takes a lot of energy and can be very challenging, it's also an awesome period. Every day Nick is learning or achieving something new. I'm constantly surprised by the new things he can do or understand. In the past two weeks, his vocabulary has more than tripled (okay, so not a HUGE number when he was at about three words before, but still). He understands questions and can answer with a clear nod of the head (not quite saying "yes") or a very verbal "no" (usually accompanied by a vigorous shake of his head). It's great finally to understand what he wants through "conversation," instead of playing the pointing/guessing game and trying to figure out what he wants before his whines turn into screams. He also has picked up quite a few animals noises, which is always a fun game to play. He can roar, oink, moo and does a mean elephant trumpet.

He knows when he's not supposed to do things and understands "no" means "stop." Although instead of STOPPING, he usually gets a mischevious smile, wags his little finger and says "no, no," right before returning to his "no, no" activity--like messing with the controls on the DVD player. It's so adorable when he says it that it's hard to take a hard line and show him we mean business. Usually we just act like idiots, repeating back "no, no" in a sing-song voice, hoping he'll wag his finger again. Yes, we're chumps.

My favorite, favorite, favorite new trick, however, is his kisses!!! We ask for a kiss and he puckers right up and lays one on us--a vast improvement over the sloppy, open-mouth face press we used to get. After a kiss, I usually get a great big hug around the neck. Love, love, love! So far, he doesn't get sick of giving them, unlike Lainey who will sometimes ration me, "No more kisses for you today, mommy. You can have one tomorrow." Now Nick can keep me supplied with the love!

Pucker ready...

...smackaroo!

"No, no!"

A Weekend Away

                  Condo with a View

Mark and I escaped for long weekend to Florida for our six-year anniversary. It was a much needed few days away and we did nothing but sleep, eat, and hang on the beach. I haven't felt this rested and relaxed in over three years. No joke. 

We were originally set to stay at a mid-range hotel, but we ended up scoring a free condo. I was just excited to have free lodging on the beach, so when we arrived to the four-bedroom, two-bath condo with a balcony bigger than our kitchen, I thought "sure, guess we can make due with this." The fact that there was a French bakery right next to it was just powdered sugar on my beignet! 

Because we were so utterly lazy, I really don't have much to report on from our trip. The beach was not crowded, the water was warm, no rain crossed our path. Just a perfect couple of days with my best fella', drinking beer and daiquiris and enjoying some time together. 

Happy Anniversay, Mark! Let's make it another 60...