Happy Halloween!

It was a blustery, cold day (first snow of the season), but our little Elsa and Olaf still hit the trick or treating trail. The Olaf costume came with a hat, so he was all good, and as for Elsa, "the cold never bothered (her) anyway" (sorry, I couldn't resist!). Being the smart parents we are, we actually dressed the kids up last weekend on that beautiful 70-degree day and took some pictures in the backyard. True to form, they weren't super cooperative in posing, but they were even worse tonight (and things started to get tense as we tried to get ONE decent shot), so I'm glad we took the time last weekend. See results below...

The kids had a party at daycare this morning, complete with a pinata and magician, and Mark and I were able to take off early to start what we hoped would be some trick or treating fun. But, the snow flurries started on the way home and by the time we were hitting houses it was sleeting and Nick was saying, "Owie! Owie!" So, we only made it to our immediate neighbors and then headed back inside. Even Elaine said she wanted to go home (so, maybe the cold bothered her a little bit).

I think Lainey was a little disappointed, but no problem for Nick. We had plenty of surplus candy, so he just helped himself our bowl and filled up his pumpkin pail. If we would have given him free reign, he would have eaten it all, too. Instead, we had to endure several tantrums when we denied him more of the sweet stuff. We eased Lainey's pain with pepperoni pizza (her new favorite food) and some extra TV time. It worked...right before bed, she smiled and said, "Mommy, I had a fun Halloween!" I'm so glad, my little love!

Queen Elsa and Me

Dad and Olaf

I guess the snow is fitting, given the costumes...

Don't mind if I do...

OK to Wake!

OK to WAKE!

After three years of battling bedtime, sleeping on the couch, sleeping on her floor, not sleeping at all, Lainey may FINALLY allow us the full night's sleep we've so desperately craved. We've had a solid six weeks of her letting us leave her room after story time and fall asleep on her own (so, nice getting those 30 - 60 minutes back each night) and other than a few nights where she's had a nightmare or has been sick, she sleeps through the night. We got to that point using the trusty "Lainey's Rewards" sticker method. This was amazing progress and we were really happy, but she was still getting up at 4:30 AM every day, which we weren't really happy about. Enter the OK to Wake alarm clock--the best $30 we've ever spent!

You set the clock for a certain time in the morning, but instead of an alarm, the clock glows green. This is the signal that is "OK to wake" and your little one can get out of bed. The clock glows instead of making noise, so if your munchkin is blissfully snoozing PAST the set time, she will sleep right through it. You can also rig a light with a timer for those DIYs out there, but we wanted a clock for her room anyway, so we went this route. We started it with Lainey almost two weeks ago and she's waited every single morning to call for me until it goes off. I can't believe it was this easy!!! She gets her sticker rewards for staying in her room (she doesn't have to stay in bed--she can play) and earned a cupcake last Friday. She's so proud every morning I go in her room, "Mommy, I did it again!"

So sleep training took the long route with Lainey, but I think we're finally there...just in time for Nick to start getting up at 4:30 AM every day...wah wah.

Pumpkinfest!

I'm about a week overdue for this post, but better late than never. Last weekend, Dad and Sharon visited and we took the opportunity to hit up the Pumpkinfest at Didier Farms. We lucked out with gorgeous weather, and it was surprisingly uncrowded and easy to hop from ride to ride and move about selecting our pumpkins.

Lainey had a blast and Nick got his first turn at a few carnival rides…even going on one with just his big sister to watch over him. I was pretty reluctant to try that, but Mark persuaded me. The super slide was Lainey’s favorite, although I’m not sure how Nick felt about that one. He didn’t cry, but he didn’t smile either. He just kind of let his tongue hang out the side of his mouth like a dog. 

The one ride that was a little questionable was the army tank with machine guns. Lainey wanted to go on it and there was no line, so I said, “Sure!” It wasn’t until I was standing there poised to take her picture that I realized my 3-year-old was sitting in an army tank with machine guns! What?! The ride couldn’t have been just as fun with some sort of other carriage? Watching Lainey work those guns back and forth just didn’t sit right with me. But, I guess I should have been a little more observant before I sent her on her way.

We had fun picking out our pumpkins. Lainey and Nick kept loading them into the wagon (and Mark and I kept taking them back out). Lainey pulled the wagon all the way to the car. I gotta say I was pretty impressed. She did a great job maneuvering the crowds and it wasn’t exactly a short walk.

I wish I had better pictures or had taken at least ONE family photo, but I didn’t. The kids are not cooperative about posing and most of the time trying to get a picture turns into a stressful event. So, I settle for whatever quick shots I can get and when they start protesting I stop. I’d prefer spend the time actually building a memory than trying to perfectly preserve it to look back on later. (But, it’s taken me a while to get there…Mark’s still working on it, hence why I don’t push for family pictures. He just ends up disappointed.) Here's what I did manage to get of the little rascals...now we just need to find time to carve those pumpkins!

Lainey LOVES the slide!

Nick migh be glad it's over...

No other ideas ride makers...

First pony ride!

Oh yeah...and there were pumpkins, too!

Second Child...

Last week, we were sitting with the kids while they colored and I commented, “you know, Lainey knew her colors by this age.” So, Mark holds up a green crayon and asks Nick what color it is…”Reen!,” he shouts. Holds up a yellow one…”Ello!” Holds up a red one, “Red!” Holds up a blue one…”Reen!” Close, little buddy. So, he’s not perfect at it, but clearly he’s on track. We just didn’t know it! (We kind of discovered that he knows his body parts in the same fashion.)

I wish I could say we spend as much time fostering the basics with Nick as we did Lainey, but I would be lying. She benefitted from undivided attention in those first two years, and he has to share. On top of that he has a sister, who knows how to demand MORE than her fair share.

But, while I let a lot of parenting shortcomings (or at the very least perceived shortcomings) get to me, this isn’t going to be one of them. I have no doubt that somehow he will manage to overcome his standing as second child and still master his alphabet, numbers, and colors well within the normal range of things. Two things I know he gets his fair share of are hugs and kisses! Who could resist those cheeks?

Little Drummer Boy

Dude Still Looks Like a Lady

Maybe it's those soft, soft hands of his, but evidently something about Mark just says "mama" to our kids. If you'll recall, Lainey went through a "daddy is mommy" phase, and Nick is following right in her footsteps. For some unexplicable reason, Nick started calling Mark "Mama" a few weeks ago. The difference with Nick is he mainly calls Mark "mama" when he's upset or wants Mark's attention--maybe it's Nick's form of punishment. If Mark leaves the room, Nick will let loose with a forlorn call of "Mama" and go chasing after him. Today, even though the real Mama was holding him, Nick wailed "Maaaaaaa-maaaaaa" arms outstreched and tears rolling down his face, because Mark dared go to the bathroom.

I personally don't want to hear any complaints. Mark is Nick's best friend. I'd let Nick call me "Dada" all day, if he adored me a fraction of the way he adores Mark. At least I get to hear my name...

Mama's make good nap buddies

Mom (formerly known as Kylie)

I’m having a bit of an identity crisis. I realized it might be time for some self-reflection when I had a mild panic attack while shopping for some new clothes online. The search for new black pants should not make me hyperventilate, but as I hopped from website to website and scrolled through pages of thumbnails, it occurred to me that I have no idea what is on trend right now—do people still wear boot cut? Or is skinny the only way to go? Straight leg looks polular. And what is this “drapey” style I see?  Too many choices!!! Even worse, as I tried to zero in on a few key wardrobe addtions, I was at a complete loss as to what my personal style is these days—assuming one should not adopt yoga pants and event t-shirts as her personal style. Not that I have ever been a super-edgy, fashionista, but I used to know how to throw an outfit together and doll myself up right. And shopping has certainly never been a stress-inducing activity. I ended up just shutting down the computer.

The shopping meltdown led me to start thinking about other ways I feel out-of-touch these days.  The only way I keep up on current events is through my daily “Skimm” e-newsletter and viewings of The Daily Show as I nod off at night. As far as what's happing in the world of pop culture--beats me! I couldn’t name one song on the top 40, if you offered me a winning lottery ticket to do it and could name maybe 1 or 2 actors under the age of 35. Which some may say is a good thing, but it just makes me feel old. I find myself totally confused when scrolling through facebook and Instagram, trying to decipher all the acronyms and emoji and figure out what the hell people are talking about. Thank heaven for Urban Dictionary!

As for my literature knowledge, could someone please remind me what a novel is again? When Chris and Sean visited this summer, the subject of “what books have you read” came up. Four years ago, I would have rattled off at least four or five recent reads. This time I was like “uh, uh…But, Not the Hippopotamus? What? You haven’t read it? You should…it’s a classic. Great take on marginalization with a total surprise ending of the oppressed becoming the oppressor. I really felt for the armadillo.”

And then there is the issue of lapsed communications with friends. Friends, whom I love so dearly and miss every day, but I just can’t seem to find the time to call or email, let alone find time to actually SEE. And each day that passes seems to make it harder to reach out and I fear by the time I get my act together those relationships may just silently slip away.

Lately, I just feel like I’m stumbling through each day, trying to get it all done, but with no clear purpose. I feel I’m always reactive, not proactive, and it’s giving me a case of the “icks.” I’m a planner by nature. I like a clean “to do” list that gets cleared regularly. I like time to myself. I like extra sleep. I like lazy days with a good book and long brunches with friends. None of these “likes” are really compatible with my life right now. Outside of time with the kids, I’m forgetting what else interests me and brings me joy.

I know this is a phase of life. I know it will not last forever. I know in a flash I’ll have two teenagers who are NEVER home and NEVER want my attention. But, while I’m on this ride of motherhood and total infatuation with my young ones, what happens if I forget how to be me?