Happy Halloween!!!

Tinkerbell...complete with the attitude!

Our little Tinkerbell partied it up over the weekend! First at daycare on Friday and then at our friends', the Kabances, house on Saturday. While she looks oh-so-sweet here, I really think a WWF outfit would have been more fitting. In fact, her daycare sheet comment yesterday was "Lainey wanted to be a wrestler today. The other kids were not as excited." **Sigh.** Looks like she's keeping her rough and tumble ways for now (but, I have to admit, I kinda' dig that she's tough like that--as long as she doesn't become a bully).

We won't be Trick-or-Treating tonight. I have to work late and she's still too young anyway. We'd just end up with a lot of candy around the house for us to eat and that's the last thing a pregnant lady needs...easily accessible temptations!

Two weekends ago, we made some Jack o' Lanterns. We thought we'd take advantage of the warm weather surge and do it outside with Lainey. But, the distractions were too much for her and we had to move it back inside. Hard to make any carving progress when the wee one keeps darting for the street.

All-in-all a much brighter Halloween than last year! And I know that if Mom can see Lainey's antics, she's been tickled lately. I can hear her in my head all the time saying "She's too much, Kylie, she's just too much!"

Helping dig out the seeds!

The finished products!

Butterflies

I had to wait until almost 22 weeks to feel Elaine moving about in my belly, but those familiar flutters started last week and are building in frequency and strength. Looks like this little one is already working those legs muscles with a fervor. S/he must know Lainey will be a tough big sister to keep up with and is starting endurance training now.

And the mystery of "he" or "she" will remain just that until we all meet for the first time! Mark and I decided to keep the suspense going this time and to wait until the baby's birthday for the big reveal. My mom would gave been very happy with our choice. . .

Family Daze

The past month has kept us busy with lots of visits from our beloved family members! Uncle Chris came across the pond at the end of September; my Dad and his girlfriend Sharon took advantage of a free weekend (OSU was playing away) and drove up two weekends ago; and Aunt Rebecca, Uncle Tim, Jacob and Ben were super troopers and made a day trip over last Saturday. Elaine loved all her visitors and the extra attention.

Chris got the most mundane of activities, but he had friends to visit while he was here, so I didn't feel too bad about not planning anything (and I did treat him to a marathon of Honey Boo Boo).

We hit the Chicago Botanical Garden, Logan Square Farmer's Market and the Bucktown Apple Pie Contest with Dad and Sharon. Of course, it rained the whole weekend for the first time in probably two months. We managed to just avoid the rain at the garden, but got stuck under an awning for about 20 minutes at the farmer's market and had to do a mad rush into the pie contest, as a down pour broke loose just as we arrived. Fun was still had by all! Extra bonus for Mark and me:  we got out to see a movie at an actual movie theater Saturday nights, while Dad and Sharon babysat and watched the OSU game. We saw Looper, which I wasn't really excited about seeing, but turned out to be a pretty great flick.

And last, but certainly not least, the Kammler crew popped over on Saturday for a day in Chicago. We hit up Dunlay's on the Square for lunch and then I headed home with Lainey for her nap, while the rest went down to check out the Willis Tower (or Sears Tower, if you're still in protest of the name change) Skydeck. From how it was relayed, the lines were ridiculous, but the experience was awesome! I'm kinda' jealous I didn't go, but did enjoy a very long, very cuddly nap with my little girl. We topped off the day with a trip to Pequod's, our favorite pizza in the city. Lainey had so much fun laughing at her cousins silly faces and playing games (like handing a bowl back and forth with Jacob--over and over and over--thanks for being patient and humoring her, Jacob!).

I'm sad to say, I didn't get any pictures last weekend with Lainey and her aunt, uncle and cousins. But, I have a few from the other weekends. Enjoy!

Lainey and Uncle Chris at Palmer Square

Lainey and Grandpa at the Chicago Botanical Garden



Lainey was trying to lift the concrete spheres - she wasn't successful.
(But, she was adorable trying!)



7 Musings

I had meant to write and post this the night before Lainey’s first birthday, but it kinda’ got pushed down on the “to do” list.

Parenthood is hard (as everyone will tell you). It has its ups and downs. But, every morning when I see Lainey’s big grin and her sweet little arms reaching for me, I am thankful for the awesome blessing of being her mom. The bigger she gets, the harder it is for me to believe that I half-created this amazing person and grew her in my belly for over nine months!

Things I’ve learned since Elaine joined our world…

#1:  I love Elaine every second of every day, but I don’t always love being a mom…

There I said it. Gasp if you must. Don’t get me wrong, I never wish I didn’t choose to be a mother, but there are definitely times when I wish I could take a few days vacation from the job. And I call it a job, because it is work. Work with unbelievable rewards and benefits, but still very, very hard work. And I think it’s okay to acknowledge that aspect and not always be thrilled to be up at 5:30am on a Saturday morning listening to the activity table cheerfully sing, “Hellooooo, the phone is ringing, so I say helloooooo!”—over and over and over. (The play kitchen has some great ditties, too. )

#2:  I spent way too much time and energy stressing over breastfeeding…

I was more frustrated and cried harder over this struggle than anything else as a new mother. And now I see how silly I was being. Is breastmilk best? Yes. Is it more economical? Hell, yes. Would Elaine really have suffered if I’d put her on formula earlier or would we have had to declare bankruptcy? No. She would have been fine and we’d have still paid our mortgage. And I would have been a much happier and more relaxed mama. I honestly believe that the pressure I put on this single aspect of mothering Lainey ultimately hurt my relationship with her in those first months. In my effort to do what was “best” for her, I prevented myself from just enjoying being with her tiny little self.

So friends, remind me of this when #2 makes his/her appearance this spring.

#3:  I spent way too much time and energy stressing in general…

Is she eating enough? Is she eating too much? Is she too hot? Too cold? Why won’t she sleep? Why is she sleeping so much? Why hasn’t she rolled over? She rolls over and now she sleeps on her stomach! SHE’S TOO YOUNG TO SLEEP ON HER STOMACH!!!

You get the picture. I had promised myself before I had Lainey that I wouldn’t read all the parenting books. A promise I should have kept. Every time I picked up a book on sleeping or eating or whatever I was trying to figure out that week, I would go into a tailspin over everything I was doing “wrong” according to this doctor or that expert. In the end, good parenting isn’t rocket science. Kids are resilient. At the very basic level what they need is love, food, and clean diapers. The rest works itself out.

Again friends, I ask you to remind me of this around March 2

#4:  Being a working mom is tough…
I miss my girl. I miss important moments—she took her first steps at daycare. I have to cram all the errands and housework into nights and weekends. Sometimes, actually quite often, I get really frustrated that I can’t keep up. For the first few months back at work, I felt totally overwhelmed and like I was doing everything half-assed. Then I got really good advice from my friend, Maggie, who told me you have to lower your expectations. And she was right. Life has changed. I’m sure there are some people out there who can be the Super Mom (or Dad) and work all day, come home make a gourmet meal, and keep a spotless home all before making handmade holiday gifts for all the neighbors. But, I’m not that lady. Want to be. Wish I were. But, I’m not and trying to be just makes me feel like a failure.

So, while I’m not always good about it, I try to let the chores slide in favor of more face time with Elaine or fun family outings or even 30 minutes of mindless tv. Five years from now am I going to remember that I didn’t fold laundry for two weeks? No, but I will remember Lainey’s first trip to the pool and our evening playtime. And her kisses and hugs give me infinitely more satisfaction that a clean kitchen.  Not to mention watching a little reality tv or other parents during a trip to the zoo can really boost your self-esteem. You realize maybe you’re not doing so horribly after all. 

#5:  But, working has its rewards…

I get quiet time to myself during the commute to read, check email, or just stare into space.

I get adult interaction (although some adults behave no better than a screaming child).

I can run a few errands during the day or take care of online things without Lainey trying to steal the laptop.

I’m really good at my job and that feels really good and makes me more confident as a person, and therefore, as a mother.

I get MONEY!

#6:  Just because it seems like everyone else is doing it better, doesn’t mean they are...

And if they are, so what? I went through a lot days thinking I was the only hot mess of a new mama out there. I still do. There are nights (although much further apart these day) when I have a meltdown and pout about how I can’t do it and don’t understand how everyone else handles it all so well. And my blessed husband, will say “how do you know they're doing great? You’re doing an awesome job.” Which brings me to #7… 

#7:  I could never do this without a strong partner…

God bless Mark Brandi. I would have been checked into the loony bin long ago without him. His patience (at least with Lainey and me) is endless.  He can come home from the most stressful day,  drop it all at the door and go into full force daddy mode. He can stay out until 2am on a Friday night and still get up at 6:30 the next morning to eat breakfast with Lainey. He hugs me when I’m sad, calms me when I’m angry, and makes me stop and take "me time" when I need it. Simply put, he’s awesome. The best. My main man.

So, kudos to all the single parents out there! You’re amazing, amazing people. I am incredibly fortunate to have a superman on my side.

I think that's probably enough ramblings. Yes, life is very different from before we had Elaine. But, different is good. Different helps you grow. Different makes you appreciate the days that came before and excites you for what lays ahead.

CHOPPED!

I took an impromptu vacation day last Thursday and FINALLY got around to getting a haircut! Nine inches gone and off to Pantene's Beautiful Lengths to help make a wig for some brave woman fighting cancer.

I wish I could say that I endured months upon months of patience to grow my hair to the needed length, but really I just hadn't had time (or wanted to make the time) to fit in a haircut on the weekend. To be even more honest, I forgot about the idea of donating until the hairdresser suggested it.  But, a good deed done, none the less.

I also wish I had taken a "pre" picture with my hair down. Who knows if it will ever be that long again?!

Bye-bye pigtails!

Still long enough to pull up!

DCFS is coming for us...

Turns out we had to get a doctor's note for Elaine's daycare to allow them to serve her 2% milk instead of whole. I was SUPER annoyed and thought it was the daycare being ridiculous (they do have some rather silly policies), but turns out DCFS requires them to serve whole milk to all children under the age of 2. So, I guess if a DCFS agent came in and happend to test the fat content in Lainey's milk cup, the center needs medical back-up that it's okay.

Now, I consider myself to be pretty liberal; you're definitely not going to find any Romney/Ryan bumper stickers around our place (not that I'm thrilled with the other ticket, but that is for another discussion at another time). However, sometimes government regulations go a bit too far, and I have to say it seems a little intrusive to dictate what type of milk must be served to my child.

The doctor's office laughed about it and faxed a letter over. I guess I'll keep a copy on hand at home, just in case we get a surprise visit from DCFS ourselves (Lainey's a screamer...our street is very quiet...you can hear her a block away sometimes).

15 Months and Growing!

Elaine had her 15-month check-up last Wednesday and all is well. Her stats are staying on track...height 75th percentile (31.75"), weight 90th percentile (25.3 lbs.) and head still topping the charts in the 98th percentile (19 1/8"). We're backing her off the whole milk and going with 2%--guess we're trying to keep her from climbing too high on the charts.

Her development is also perfectly where it should be. In fact, and not to brag or anything, she already can do everything on the 16-month Ages & Stages Questionnaire. That's right folks...she's a whole three weeks ahead of the curve. That's why she has such a big head; it's housing a big, beautiful brain! I do have to say that Mark and I have been amazed over that past few weeks at how quickly she's picking up words and is able to understand questions we ask and to follow directions (well, when she wants to...ask her to come put her shoes on, no problem...tell her "no" or "stop" and she won't even glance at us). Last weekend I was sorting laundry and asked Lainey to bring me one of the laundry hampers from the other room. Now, I was just joking, but next thing I know I hear these little grunts of effort and turn to see Lainey pulling a half-full hamper across the room to me.

My favorite new development has to be the emergence of the word "mommy." After months of "dada" and "dadeeee", it's just awesome to hear mommy, mommy, mommy. I can't get enough of it! Although, it makes some things more difficult. It's one thing to ignore her cries when she's resisting bedtime, it's another to deafen my ears to the plaintive cries of "mommmmeeeeee"! Add that to two chubby little hands reaching up from her crib and I'm toast. Let's just say she got to fall asleep in bed with me last night, instead of her crib. Well played, little Lainey, well played.

So, that's a quick update on our girl. Now that I'm back on my feet post-stomach flu, I'll try to get a few more posts in this week. Like how the house hunt is going...oh wait--there is absolutley no news on that front other than we haven't found a house. But, I'm sure I can come up with something to babble on about. In the meantime, enjoy a video of Laineybug playing with daddy (I don't know how she kept her pacifier in her mouth the whole time)!

We are experiencing technical difficulties...

I had well intentioned plans to write a few posts this week about my brother's visit, Lainey's 15-month check-up, and just some random thoughts about my first year of motherhood (that post has been in the works since Lainey's birthday). But, I've been sidelined by a nasty stomach bug. Please stay tuned...