I'm Thirty-WHAT?!

When did I get old?

Turning one year older has never bothered me; I've always liked celebrating my birthday. I'm mean having a birthday is definitely preferable to the alternative, right? But, for some reason 34 makes me feel old! Wasn't I just turning 24 last year? How did I hit my mid-thirties so quickly? Joanna Kerns was only 32 when she starting taping Growing Pains. Think about that. I'm older than Mrs. Seaver.

My laugh lines are staying put long after the laughing stops, my spider veins are multiplying, and various parts of my body are succumbing to gravity.  Forget saving for the kids' college funds...I'm saving for botox, laser treatments, and a boob lift. Instead of a night out to celebrate, I'd kill for eight hours of uninterrupted sleep (followed by two more for good measure). I'm going to a bachelorette party on Saturday and praying that I don't black-out after drinking two beers. And I'm quite sure I'll end up with alcohol poisoning if I have more than four. Four beers used to just be the pre-party.

But, while I no longer look like a co-ed and my stamina for a night out has dwindled, I still think every year gets better than the last. I'm digging my thirties. I'm comfortable in my skin and in my life choices. I'm a calmer, less dramatic version of my 20-something self. I know having the last word, doesn't necessarily make you the winner and drawing attention, doesn't necessarily make you interesting. While I'm still striving to be a better person and pursue new challenges, and hope I always will be, I'm doing it for me--not to prove something to someone else. I may have traded in my four-inch heels for ballet flats and bar crawls for Chuck E Cheese parties, but I'm happy, healthy, and loved.

So, bring on the mid-thirties...and the late thirties...and keeping it going right up to the nineties, should I be so blessed. Because if things keep improving at the rate of the past 34 years, I'll be having one kickass life at 94! I think I'll ask for 35 candles on my cake tonight...I need one to grow on.

Date Night

Mark and I hit the town Saturday to see The Book of Mormon (the tickets were an early birthday gift). This is the first night out we've had since September. Since we're watching our cash flow right now (we close on the house in two weeks!!!), we opted for pre-show drinks at The Gage versus dinner out. I also didn't want to worry about making a dinner reservation if the kiddos delayed our departure from the apartment for one reason or another. Who wants to start a nice night out with a whole bunch of stress and rushing around?

As it turned out, all went well on the sitter front. Lainey and Nick were both on their best behaviors. I on the other hand was a clumsy mess that night. First, I managed to elbow a guy in the face when I stumbled on the el. Luckily it wasn't too hard and he was nice about it. Then at the theater I hit the bottom of my champagne glass while talking too wildly with my hands, spilling it on my lap and splashing the woman next to me. Again, luckily not much spilled, and she was really nice about it. So, not my most graceful outing, but whatever. 

The show was really great and it felt nice to get gussied up a bit and have some solo time with my main man. With Mark's crazy work schedule and our crazier kids, we haven't had much time to focus on each other lately. 

Of course, we paid the price for our glorious evening. After going to bed around 12:30 AM, Nick proceeded to ditch his streak of sleeping 6 or more hours and got up at 2:30 AM and 4:30 AM. Lainey decided she should get up at 4:30 AM, too. Only instead of going back to sleep like her brother, she thought it best to just be up for the day. Yaaaaay! We were exhausted, but it was still worth it.

Tracks of My Tears

What was I thinking putting make-up on before taking the kids to daycare this morning? As soon as I handed Nick over and he gave me his crooked smile that I so love, my eyes filled and it was all over. At least I made it out the door before I pulled one of those embarrassing snort-sobs. 

I have the day packed with errands, chores, and cooking (stocking the freezer with quick meals for busy after-work evenings). If I just keeping going, going, going 5 pm will be here before I know it!

12 Weeks is Not Three Months

My maternity leave with Elaine went fast. My maternity leave with Nick went at warp speed. Friday was my last day at home with my little guy (and we spent half the day at an ENT appointment for Lainey). I haven't done any posts this week, because I've spent every moment drinking up his sweet face. During the days, I think he slept maybe 30 minutes out of my arms all week. I thought going back to work was going to be way easier this time, but it won't be. I already cried when driving to pick Lainey up from daycare at noon on Friday. Not because I didn't want to have her with me, but because it meant my alone time with Nick was really over. Of course there will be stolen time for one-on-ones with him, but who knows when and who knows for how long. I am so happy we made the decision to keep Lainey in daycare three days as week; again, not because I don't adore my daughter, but because it was really special to have that time with just Nick. It's a luxury that most people don't get to have with their younger children. I feel really blessed that I had that time with him.

So, Monday is going to be tough. Even more so than with Lainey, I've been Nick's main caretaker every day of his little life with Mark taking most of the lead with Lainey. So, I'm nervous of how he'll be with strangers. On top of having to be separated from him all day, my poor little guy has his first cold courtesy of big sister. She just can't keep herself from getting up in his face and loves smothering him with kisses these days. It's adorable except when she leaves a trail of snot across his face...sorry Nicky Nick (that's what Lainey calls him). Even with the cold, I'm sure sure he'll fair much better than me this week. I'm going to miss his sweet smiles and coos.

And I have to confess, while I lament are impending separation, I could keep him home another two days. I don't go back to work until Wednesday, but I'm taking one day to do doctor's appointments and errands and one day just for me (although that day is looking more and more like another errand/chore day). Let's see if I can make it to 5pm each day before going to pick the kids up...

This Guy

Memorial Day in Moline

The weather did not cooperate, but we still had a fun Memorial Day weekend in Moline. It's always great to be with family. This trip was extra exciting, because we got to introduce Nick to his Aunt Rebecca, Uncle Tim, and cousins, Jacob and Ben.

The rainy cold weather kept us cooped up inside, but it was beyond wonderful to be out of the apartment for an entire weekend. I've really been feeling claustrophobic lately and needed some room to breathe. I would have been more than happy to have the extra space and hands to help with the kids, but as a bonus Mark and I worked in a hot date to the mall for Chik-fil-A and Whitey's ice cream--what more can a girl ask for?

Lainey very much enjoyed having a new audience and more people to boss around. Jacob and Ben were beyond patient and kind with her. Playing with an almost two-year-old girl probably wasn't at the top of their weekend wish list, but they humored her and gave her the attention she demanded (not sure they could have escaped her anyway). Lainey talks about Jacob non-stop and beamed when he let her play his guitar, but I think Ben won a special place in her heart when he helped her climb and scoot down the stairs...again...and again...and again, until I put him out of his misery. Thanks for being such awesome big cousins, guys!

Monday morning, the rain finally broke and the temperature rose, so Lainey had her first puddle stomping outing. Of course she was adorable in her boots and rain jacket. I don't know who was happier to finally get outside, Lainey or Mark.

Alas, the weekend went much too quickly. We're looking forward to having the entire Brandi clan together at the end of June for Eleanor's baptism and Ben and Elaine's birthdays. We can't wait to meet little Eleanor (born just two days after Nick). We now have 7 kids total among Mark and his siblings families...all the more love to spread and share!

Nick pretty much slept on Lonnie all weekend long--hope her arms and wrists have recovered!

Hanging with Grandpa

These boots are made for stomping

Monkey Swing

I've been a little sluggish this week and there's really not much news in our world, so I'm going to do a lazy post. Here's a video of Lainey's new favorite past time...the "monkey swing." We think she's adorable...hope you do, too! (And you'll hear how brain dead I've been when I debate out loud with myself whether orthopedic would be the correct term for back surgery.)

The Witching Hour(s)

The only thing marring Nick's perfect behavior is his nightly screamfest between 6:00 and 8:00 PM. I know it's normal and lots of babies go through it (Lainey's twilight angst was much worse actually), but I'm ready to be done with it. Especially, since we now have the windows open every night, so the whole 'hood can hear what's going down in our place (and Lainey often does her best to drown out Nick's wails with screams of her own).  

There is light at the end of the tunnel, however. Recently, I've been able to comfort Nick by strapping him to my chest in the Baby K'tan (LOVE this carrier by the way...far easier to use than the Moby Wrap). After a few minutes he'll go from all out wails to softer whimpers and finally silence before dosing off.  It's not a perfect situation, because it's tough to get Lainey fed, bathed and in PJs with Nick front and center, but it's a whole lot less stressful than listening to him scream. 

Fortunately, tonight is a Saturday, so Mark is home for the nighttime routine. He's taking care of Laineybug, and I get to just sit, relax, and rock my Nick to sleep. Aaaaah...so sweet. I won't miss the crying, but I know I'll miss the cuddling down the road.